Exactlyyyy

It's as if she's typing up my heart's emotions and my minds thoughts.
It's insane, bananas and i dont even know how to react. This is -verbatum- what I was thinking about, oh sayy..3 weeks ago. Craziness, lol.

it is my testimony to give. Not someone elses to divulge, and their doing so disturbs me. I just feel like the longer I live, the more I am learning to not trust people. And maybe I'm naive, but I don't want to have to think this way. I want people to say something and mean it. Do something and stand by it. Prove themselves consistent. Faithful. Loyal.

That may be a stretch, because I feel like my loyalty only lies within few (who have proven themselves worthy), but I like to believe that I am a woman of my word and I don't lead people to believe things about me or the relationships I am involved in that is otherwise. So, I don't understand why other people find the need to, unless their ulterior motive lies in getting close to people just so they can know their personal business for their benefit.

And if that's the case-when it comes to me, all you have to do is ask. I'm living life and making mistakes the same as everyone else. It's all good. You don't have to put on a facade. If you're that interested in my doings as they relate to you (if they even relate to you), just say so. I'd actually find your bluntness commendable. Closed mouths don't get fed, and we all got to eat. I understand.

I’ve stopped allowing my Ex to pretend that we are friends, as it served no purpose but to allow him to feel better about the situation . When I need him, he is never around. When I want him, he is never around. I got high friend standards and he ain’t meetin em. So why call it friendship when he only serves as a second tier acquaintance. I honestly don’t think he knows how to truly be someone’s friend.

I gotta stop trickin off wit these young and nubile hoe ass dudes. They fun and shit but you can’t keep em. Plus, I think I wanna have some babies one day and these non-committal, “It’s all about me” kinda guys aren’t gonna cut it.

and look at how pretty this poem is:

“For all we know,
We may never meet again.
Before you go, make this moment sweet again.
We won’t say goodnight until the last minute.
I’ll hold out my hand and my heart will be in it.

For all we know this may only be a dream.
We come and we go like the ripples of a stream.
So love me, love me tonight. Tomorrow was made for some.
Tomorrow may never come,
For all we know.”

Rebecca McFadden, Poet

I meeeeeeeeeeeeeean, ...SMH